We often hear that great leaders are confident—decisive, assured, unshakeable. Confidence is important. But if confidence is left unchecked, it quickly turns into ego. And the truth is, ego never makes a leader stronger—it isolates them. It creates a barrier between the leader and their team, making it harder for real collaboration and trust to happen.
That’s where confident humility comes in, as described by Adam Grant.
Confident humility is the leadership balance that matters. It’s about knowing your strengths but not needing to prove them. It’s about stepping up to lead but being unafraid to say, “I don’t have all the answers.” It’s about embracing vulnerability, seeing it not as weakness, but as a way to strengthen relationships and build trust.
Confidence is Conviction, Not Control
Let’s start with confidence. When you think of confident leaders, you probably imagine someone who takes charge, is clear in their direction, and isn’t afraid to make decisions. That’s what we often think leadership is all about—control. But the best leaders aren’t confident because they control everything. They’re confident because they’ve put in the work. They trust their preparation and the people around them.
Confidence without control means you’re secure enough to let others contribute. It’s not about proving you’re always right. It’s about trusting your ability to guide the team, even if that means letting others take the lead in areas where they have expertise.
The true strength of confident leadership is in knowing that being decisive doesn’t mean going it alone.
Humility Without Fear
Now, let’s talk about humility. For some, humility might seem at odds with leadership. After all, aren’t leaders supposed to be the ones with the answers? But humility isn’t about diminishing your role—it’s about recognizing that you don’t have to know it all.
Humility means understanding that your leadership isn’t about your ego. It’s about serving others, listening, and being open to feedback. It means accepting that, sometimes, others will have better ideas—and that doesn’t make you any less of a leader. In fact, it makes you a better one.
In a world where leaders often feel pressured to appear invulnerable, humility creates space for connection. It allows you to relate to your team on a human level. When you’re willing to say, “I don’t know, but I’m willing to find out,” you invite collaboration and build a culture where everyone feels valued. And when your team feels valued, they’re willing to go above and beyond to deliver.
Where Confidence and Humility Meet
At the intersection of confidence and humility, you find a leader who isn’t afraid to lead but also isn’t afraid to listen. You find a leader who makes decisions but doesn’t make those decisions alone. You find a leader who’s willing to be wrong—and who uses that as an opportunity to grow.
Think about it this way: confidence without humility can lead to arrogance, and humility without confidence can lead to passivity. But when the two come together, you create a leader who is steady and strong, yet open to change. A leader who knows their worth but doesn’t need to prove it. A leader who creates a culture where trust and collaboration flourish.
How to Practice Confident Humility
- Trust Your Preparation:
Confidence comes from preparation, experience, and learning. Trust that you’ve done the work, but stay open to feedback and new perspectives. - Listen More Than You Speak:
Humility means knowing when to listen. Give your team space to contribute and create a culture where their input is valued. Leadership isn’t about knowing everything—it’s about creating an environment where the best ideas rise to the top. - Admit When You’re Wrong:
No leader is perfect. Mistakes are inevitable, and confident humility means owning those mistakes when they happen. The real growth comes not in being perfect, but in being willing to learn and adapt. - Share Credit:
Confidence isn’t about taking all the glory. It’s about recognizing the contributions of your team and sharing success. When leaders share credit, they build loyalty and respect. - Stay Curious:
Confident leaders stay curious. They’re always asking questions, always seeking to improve. Humility keeps you grounded in the knowledge that there’s always more to learn.
Confident Humility in Action
Great leaders aren’t built on ego. They’re built on the ability to balance confidence with humility. It’s not about being the loudest voice in the room—it’s about knowing when to step forward and when to step back. It’s about leading with strength while being open to learning from those around you.
Confident humility allows leaders to lead with both heart and mind. It creates space for collaboration, drives continuous improvement, and strengthens relationships within teams. It’s not the loudest form of leadership—but it’s the most impactful.
So, as you move forward in your own leadership journey, ask yourself: Am I confident enough to lead and humble enough to listen? If you can answer yes to both, you’re already on your way to exceptional leadership.